Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Race, Insecurities, and The Fear of Buyer's Remorse: The Fans' Defense of RG3

By. Mike Baxter

The more things change, the more things stay the same around the DC Sports scene. Put all the DC sports franchises into a hat and randomly pick one out, and you're most likely going to get a scenario that played out last season, and the season before that one, none of which produced a title or favorable result.

So goes the Redskins and the conversation at Quarterback just one pre-season game into the 2015 campaign. Twitter and sports talk radio was already full speed ahead into the "Kirk or RG3" talk, and we're still almost a month away from when the real games start.

Following two descent performances from both Griffin and Cousins in the pre-season opener at Cleveland, in which Robert- tho limited on time, looked comfortable enough and whose numbers should've been more inflated than they were, Pierre, AND Kirk- who started his night off completing his first 9 passes, tho against second teamers, the flood gates were open for debate and the takes were scorching hot.

So why not another hot one?

ESPN 980's Kevin Sheehan, who is my favorite annunciator of words during football season, especially when he passionately talks about his Redskins and Terps (and when he says the word 'roster'), opened up his segment the day after the Redskins pre-season opener, and loudly proclaimed his vote for Kirk Cousins:

"If we're being fair, Kirk Cousins should be competing for the starting Quarterback job. No Quarterback, on a team that has won 7 games in the last two years, with said quarterback playing poorly in most of the losses, should be handed the job. Griffin wasn't even close to Kirk Cousins in operating that offense. What's obvious is that Kirk Cousins is better for Jay Gruden's offense. Robert wasn't bad last night, but Kirk was 10 times better. And if you want to convince yourself that Kirk was playing with twos and threes, and that's why he looked good,  than go ahead. Griffin hasn't had one game with Jay Gruden that approaches the game Kirk Cousins had last year at Philly. At the very least, this should be a Quarterback competition, not a 'handed over the job' situation."

The phone calls that followed were nothing short of an all out verbal assault on Sheehan, by mostly-I've got to say- black callers. Which I'm going to tell you- because if you're too ignorant to recognize that there is a race element in this entire conversation, I want you to quit reading this post immediately, and I'd just assume never speak to you again.

Race is one of the "things" clouding fans' judgement on Griffin, and the entire "Kirk or RG3" conversation.

And it works both ways, as I've heard and I know some of the white fans are pulling for Kirk for the same dumb reason. I've heard it for 3 years now from the callers on sports talk radio, and I've seen it on Twitter. It exists, and you have people picking sides, as ignorant and pathetic as that is, because Griffin is black and Kirk is white. So don't tell me that it doesn't exist, because it does.

It would be nice to have the conversation, all things considered, with the emphasis on the only two colors that matter in this conversation, the burgundy and gold. More on "all things considered" in a minute.

Secondly, I think its pretty sad when there is a segment of the fan base who have seemed to adopt Griffin's perceived (or maybe it's real...) insecurities and the threat Cousins poses. You can't even consider the fact that maybe long term, Cousins is better, without those fans jumping your shit when you suggest it. You bring up this notion or if you even pay Cousins a compliment, these fans want no part of the conversation and they'd just assume Cousins would go away.

He is? Why is that? Please explain.
They'll talk about how much Robert's foot work has improved and how much more confident he looks, while dismissing any notion that Cousins should be considered.  Its gotten so bad that a lot of these insecure geniuses would prefer the Redskins just simply get rid of Cousins, to essentially take this threat away from Robert.

This group thinks Cousins' 9 game sample size, plus his relief both in 2012 against Baltimore and last year against Jacksonville, is all they need to see and its time to move on from him.

Are these fans that ignorant? Yes. Are they not as smart about football as they think they are? Yes.

If anything- based on the very same logic they're using to continue to be in favor of trotting Griffin out, while hoping Scot Mac pulls the trigger with someone on a trade that sends Cousins packing, this falls under the category of systematically hypocritical.

Seriously, explain this one to me....

You dismiss Cousins' small 9 game sample size, yet I'm the ignorant one to question Griffin's abilities, following the 22 mediocre starts he's had since his 2012 season ending injury? And Cousins has had some pretty monster plays/stats for a guy whose essentially a back up. But to be fair, let's consider all.

You have Griffin- who was the 2012 rookie of the year, who brought the excitement back to Redskins football, and made it fun again to be a Redskins fan. That season, though ending so brutally at home with Griffin lying on the shitty turf of Fed Ex Field, was one for the ages and thoroughly enjoyable to watch. He completed 66% of his passes for 3,200 yards, threw 20 TDs to just 5 picks, and added another 800+ yards on the ground and 7 rushing TDs.

And then there is Cousins, whose only started 9 NFL games, who went for 300 yards plus in 3 of those games, and 400 yards plus in 1 of them. The knock on him is his high turnover ratio, which if you're being honest, is pretty normal by NFL standards, for a rookie/younger quarterback, on top of the fact that he's in his 2nd offensive system in 4 years.

But for me when it comes to Cousins, it comes down to 4 games that Cousins has appeared in, that in my opinion, makes him worthy for further review:

*2012 vs. Baltimore. Straight from the bench, he led the Redskins to the game winning drive and score in 2012, versus the team who eventually went on to win the Super Bowl.

*2012 at Cleveland. The following week, he makes his first career start on the road, throws for over 300 yards and 2 TDs in a win at Cleveland.

*2013 at Atlanta. Throws for 381, 3 TDs, 2 INTs, in a 2013 late season loss.

*2014 at Philly. Ho-hums it for 427 yards passing, going 30-48, 3 TDs and a pick.

Griffin, since returning from his injury and in between his other "dings" (4 total times that he's been knocked out of a game, dating back to the hit he took vs. Baltimore his rookie year), has started 22 NFL games, thrown for 300 yards plus just 7 times, and 400 yards plus 0 times. And oddly enough, which you could critique both QBs for different reasons, their TD to INT ratios are very similar, even while Griffin has started 13 more games.

Cousins 18 TDs, 19 INTs. Griffin 20 TDs, 18 INTs.

Cousins is the one bringing the drama???
You would think Cousins small sample size, coupled with the four games I've pointed out here, would have a Redskin fan clamoring for more, to at least see what the guy could do with more regular reps. But no, they've seen enough of him. And you would think with Griffin's mediocrity since , which certainly helped contribute to a 7 win, 25 loss record over the last two years, coupled with his propensity to get injured, would push fans towards Cousins even more. Which brings me to my final point.

The biggest reason many fans want to hold on to Griffin, is to see if he can replicate that 2012 magic, and to show the world that the squeeze of 3 first rounders and a second round pick, was well worth the Griffin juice. This too, is clouding fan judgement.

There is a lot of pride on the line from the owner on down to the random fan driving to work each morning with his #HTTR sticker in his car window. Nobody wants to punt on Griffin and/or admit that "we" might've really f**ked up in dealing all those draft picks, for a guy who at the end of the day might not be an NFL pocket passer, might be a little too injury prone for the big leagues, might be a little too polarizing for the locker room, and whose magical rookie season- who fans wish they could've bottled up and kept forever- might've just been a flash in the pan in the big scheme of things.

Using a hypothetical, ask yourself honestly- if both Robert and Kirk had been 4th round picks, would you at least want to see a competition right now? You know you would. I think you're idiot if you say you wouldn't, even without the hypothetical in play.

Bottom-line is this, all true Redskins fans want them to win. I've been a Redskins fan for 30+ years. I was fortunate enough as a kid to spend many a Sunday at RFK Stadium with my dad, my uncle, and my grandfather. There was no getting away from the fandom in my youth, and its remained, tho painful, as an adult.

So let's cut the shit- twitter and sports talk caller and anyone else who wants to go thru life with your quarterback blinders on, Kevin Sheehan is 100% correct. This team doesn't have the pedigree over the last 2-3 years, or even over the last 15-20 years, to anoint someone the starting Quarterback job back in April. Especially when the record and performances have been so bad.

And one last bit of hypocrisy, relative to my point.

Its curious to me that in one breath, practically everyone from the media, fans, and even the coaches, have acknowledged that this is Griffin's "make or break" year, relative to staying in DC, and proving that he is 100% back, and that he is a viable starting NFL Quarterback. This alone, is an acknowledgement of uncertainty in his abilities. So how come this variable doesn't come into play when considering your starting Quarterback for Week 1 versus Miami? Doesn't that seem a bit silly?

We're 7 and freaking 25 over the last two seasons, people. What's done is done, relative to the draft picks we gave up for Griffin. His rookie season is not going to be replicated in between the multiple injuries he's suffered since, and the fact that the Shanahans are not running that offense. Let it go. Giving Cousins an equal opportunity to win the job over the next 3 weeks, is the logical thing to do here.

Kevin Sheehan's Friday, August 14th comments can be heard here.

Follow Mike on twitter @Sportsyack 

Thursday, July 30, 2015

The 2015 Washington Redskins, As Predicted by Riiiiiiiiich Turpin

Here it is, the 5th Annual Washington Redskins season predictions as told by yours truly- "Rich in Centreville", Rich Turpin. If it weren't for the magical 2012 season, these predictions would be epically bad. Some say I see the Redskins through Burgundy and Gold colored glasses, others say I love to drink the Kool Aid. I prefer to call it optimism, bishes. These predictions are for entertainment purposes only. Enjoy and take notes. Rich

Week 1- Miami
The Redskins get a favorable season opener against the Miami Dolphins. The Dolphins haven't been relevant, since Dan Marino was being held hostage in that one Jim Carray movie. Dolphins' QB Ryan Tannehill doesn't exactly light the world on fire, but he does bring 2 new weapons to Fed Ex Field in Kenny Stills and Jordan Cameron. Shush it, Snowflake Fan. RG3 will do his best to eliminate all the off season negative chatter about his game, by throwing for 297 yards and 2 touchdowns. Redskins roll, 24-13. (1-0)

Week 2- St. Louis
Rams' coach Jeff Fisher didn't win any popularity contests last year with his choice of captains in last season's thrashing of the Redskins. However, he's somehow managed to pull the wool over the league's eyes for the last 15+ years, convincing everyone that he's one of the best coaches in the game. Newly acquired CB Chris Culliver intercepts Nick "Sweeeeeet" Foles 2 times, and Alfred Morris runs for 109 yards and 2 TDs, as your Washington Redskins roll, 27-14. (2-0)

Week 3- @ NYG
The Redskins take their show on the road for the first time this season, and its not going to be too money in the short weekThe Giants not only will be getting back Victor "Tom" Cruz, but this will also see the return of Jason "Fingers" Pierre-Paul. RG3 shows his first signs of his 2013 form, throwing two picks in between JPP shooting bottle rockets out of his own asshole on dares by teammates. Don't sleep on red face Coughlin for too long, cuz he'll come up and bite you. 31-17 Giants. (2-1)

Week 4- Phiadelphia
Eagles' head coach Chip Kelly did his best to run the Eagles in Dynasty Madden Mode, trading away another Pro Bowl player in RB LeSean McCoy and refusing to re-sign leading WR Jeremy Maclin. Kelly also jettisoned 2014 starting QB Nick Foles for the oft injured QB Sam Bradford. The Dynasty quickly ends as Redskins' WR Desean Jackson has his first big game of 2015, catching 6 passes for 178 yards and a TD in the Redskins 40-17 rout of Philadelphia. (3-1)

Lost Without His Father

Week 5- @ Atlanta
Former Redskins' OC Kyle Shanahan most likely had this game circled on his Marvel Comics calendar when he signed on with Atlanta. In between making sure his chores and homework were done before he went out to play, Shanahan was the OC in DC up until his Daddy was fired in 2014. Shanahan is one of the brightest young minds in the game and he has one of the best WRs in the game in Julio Jones. However, when you're poaching guys from the 2014 Redskins roster (Chris Chester, Leonard Hankerson) and perennial underachiever Matt Ryan is your QB, you have no chance. Redskins run over the dirty birds behind 245 combined yards from Alfred Morris and Rookie Matt Jones. "Get to your room, Kyle!". Redskins 20-3. (4-1)

Week 6- @ NYJ
For the second time this season, the Redskins will travel to New Jersey to take on a New York football team. However, the results are much different. Former Redskin Todd Bowles was hired to turn the Jets into a winner, but he won't be doing that with Geno Smith. The Redskins make quick work of the over-matched Jets behind 308 yards passing from RG3. Redskins roll, 35-14. (5-1)

Week 7- Tampa Bay
Fed Ex Field welcomes to town the King of the Crab legs and the king of effing 'em right in the P, #1 overall pick in the NFL Draft, Jameis Winston. The Bucs do have one of the best young QB/WR duos in Winston and WR Mike Evans, but the Redskins' defense is too much for these young studs to overcome. Led by rookie LB Preston Smith's 2 sacks, the defense forces the Bucs into 4 TOs as the Redskins win this one in a laugher, 41-10. (6-1)

Week 8- Bye Week
Take this time out to grab a drink or your favorite snack, the season starts again in just a few minutes.

Week 9- @ New England
The defending World Champs will still be a force to be reckoned with in the 2015 campaign behind Brady and Gronk, and the Redskins will feel their wrath this week. This game turns into a shootout between Brady and Griffin, with Brady throwing the game winning TD to WR Brandon Lafell with under 2 minutes to play. The Redskins attempt at a last minute, come from behind win is halted when Griffin is picked off by CB Justin Green, which results in a deflating 24-20 loss. (6-2)

Week 10- New Orleans
Gone are Jimmy Graham, Kenny Stills, and Pierre Thomas, but QB Drew Brees and his birthmark are still in command of this offense. Brees continues to keep his team competitive, but the Saints' defense at this point is a bigger mess than whatever is going on inside Caitlyn Jenner's panties. RG3 throws TD passes to Pierre Garcon, Desean Jackson, and TE Jordan Reed in the lopsided 42-20 victory. (7-2)

Week 11- @ Carolina
QB Cam Newton won't be healthy for this one, leaving back up QB Derek Anderson to try and get the job done; not happening. Recently extended LB Ryan Kerrigan- and star of "Sharknado 3: Hell No", has a season high 3 sacks and the Redskins intercept Anderson 2 times (D. Hall, Goldson) while rolling to a very convincing 30-10 victory. (8-2)

Week 12- NYG
After dropping the week 3 match-up to the G-Men up in East Rutherford, the Redskins will try to get even in the friendly confines of Fed Ex Field. However, Odell Beckham and Victor Cruz seem to have the Redskins' number as they again get it done against the NFC East leading Redskins. RG3 has his 2nd worst game of the season, throwing for 198 yards and an INT. Expect Griffin to tweet "Know Your Why" first thing Monday morning. 23-10 Giants. (8-3)

Week 13- Dallas
This will be the first match-up of the 2015 campaign between the Redskins and the defending NFC East Champion Dallas Cowboys. Dallas will hobble into PG County sporting a 4-7 record, and a month or so into the regret phase of not re-signing DeMarco Murray. RG3 has his best game of the season, throwing for 429 yards and 3 TDs in the Redskins blowout victory. Jerry's face makes "sad face", we think. 35-14 Redskins. (9-3)

Week 14- @ Chicago
Bears' Head Coach John Fox had some pretty good seasons in Denver. One was led by Tim Tebow, while the others were led by some guy named Peyton. Fox doesn't seem to have the magic with this crew, as the Bears are still looking for answers at QB. Even new Offense Coordinator Adam Gase can't right the ship that is the USS Cutler. Redskins' CB Chris Culliver intercepts Cutler 2 times and the Redskins' defense holds the Bears to just 201 total yards. 17-3, Redskins. (10-3)

Week 15- Buffalo
"Not right now, honey. I'm coaching."
The Buffalo Bills roll into town with the best record in the AFC East. Led by long time back up QB Tyrod Taylor, the Bills also boast the AFC's #1 defense. The game will be decided in the final minutes as Taylor finds newly acquired RB Lesean McCoy on a swing pass that goes for 7 yards and the game winning TD. Rex "I Like Smelly Feet and I Cannot Lie" Ryan and the Bills win, 20-17. (10-4)

Week 16- @Philadelphia
After the Redskins routed the Eagles in their first match of the season, Eagles' Head Coach Chip Kelly designs a game plan to keep the Redskins' offense off the field for as much as possible. But even with that game plan implemented, the Eagles can't seem to get out of their own way. Desean Jackson torments his former team for the 2nd time this season catching 5 passes for 154 yards and a TD. Redskins clinch the division with this win and a Giants loss. 23-14 Redskins. (11-4)

Week 17- @Dallas
Having clinched the division, the Redskins give most of their starters a rest, including QB Robert Griffin III. Kirk Cousins gets the nod for the finale, impressing for most of the game. However, Cousins throws a 4th quarter INT which halts any chance for a Redskins' victory. Dallas gets their 6th victory of the season, 17-9. (11-5)

NFC Divisional Round
The Redskins enter the playoffs as the #2 seed in the NFC thanks to their 11-5 record and their NFC East title. Following the first round bye, the Redskins draw the Seahawks, and will be looking for revenge following the 2012 Divisional Round loss in which Griffin went down. It will seem like deja vu all over again, as the Redskins storm out to a quick 14-0 lead. This time, however, there will be no ACL injuries to derail either Griffin or the entire Redskins team. Griffin takes advantage of a Richard Sherman-less Seahawks' secondary by throwing for 298 yards and 2 TDs. Running Back Alfred Morris will add 99 yards on the ground and a TD. Redskins win 24-14, and advance to the NFC Championship Game for the first time in 25 years.

NFC Championship
The Redskins will face off with Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers for an opportunity to play in Super Bowl 50. Lambeau Field will be a chilly 23 degrees, perfect Packer weather. Packers' Running Back Eddie Lacey controls the game for the Packers as the cold temperatures limit the air attacks from both teams. Lacey finishes with 131 yards rushing in the closely contested 19-13 Packers' victory. Griffin fails to throw a TD for the first time all season, and the Redskins commit a season high 4 turnovers in the loss.

Season Stats

QB Robert Griffin: 3,876 yards passing, 31 TDs, 10 INTs

RB Alfred Morris: 250 carries, 1,105 yards, 11 TDs

RB Matt Jones: 60 carries, 336 yards, 5 TDs

WR Desean Jackson: 64 receptions, 1,164 yards, 7 TDs

WR Pierre Garcon: 75 receptions, 832 yards, 5 TDs

TE Jordan Reed: 61 receptions, 622 yards, 11 TDs

Rich "from Centreville" Turpin is an eternal optimist, and lifelong Washington Redskins fan. You can follow him on twitter @therichturpin

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

The Legend Chronicles, Part 1: We're Officially in For The 2015 Contest

We're quickly approaching the 2015 NFL campaign, and yours truly and The Legend will be taking our 3rd stab at achieving NFL handicapping nirvana. I was informed today, via email, that The Legend went down to the Las Vegas Hilton, aka, The Westgate Sportsbook, and ponied up our $1,500 entry fee. This news was delivered to me in typical Legend fashion, with cuss words and insults of me, my father, and my uncle. His emails, along with our weekly 5 ATS picks, will be chronicled here for your reading pleasure. Viewer Discretion is Advised.

The Players:

Yack- me. 0-2 with The Legend in the contest. WSOP casher. Sometimes caller to The Junkies. Member of the infamous Corner Club.
The Legend- retired something or other, friend of my father, uncle, and me- I guess, and lifelong LA Dodgers fan.  He once knocked out the Pittsburgh Parrot at Three Rivers Stadium, and somehow was not arrested.
The Fat Man, aka, Fat Fuck- nickname given to my father by The Legend. For what it's worth, my father is 5'11", 193 lbs. Not exactly a "fat fuck", especially for a guy in his 60s whose in pretty good health.
Uncle Dummy, aka, Cement Head- my uncle, my father's younger brother. He's not dumb and his head is not made of cement. In fact, a very successful electrician/foreman. The Legend looks down on "blue collars".
Judge Patrick- my younger, funnier brother, and sometime contributor to the blog and Twitter one liners. He said of Twitter three years ago, "I fucking hate it. It's the official death of Western Civilization." He hasn't had a Twitter account in 3 years.

Legend's Email dated July 14th, 2015:


   We are now officially registered for the westgate football super contest.  Our alias is ‘’THE YACK’’……..just a couple of points I wish to bring to ur attention… first it is like a baseball game three strikes and ur fuckin OUT…. Even being the nephew of uncle ‘’dummy’’ u can figure out what I am talking about… second I don’t want u to tap out in week 6/7 like u elected to do so last year, u acted like a beaten down bitch slapped pussy….. and most importantly this year I firmly expect u wear ur ‘’BIG’’ boy pants and do well in the contest.  If u don’t have any ‘’BIG’’ boy pants u cud always borrow a pair from the ‘’FAT’’ man.  Best of luck to us……


Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Slider Cup Weekly Standings, Bonus Money Update, and Golfers Used


Judge P                               2395
G-Moore                              2761
N. Scalise                             2820
K-Mac                                 2834
MVP                                     2854
Bak9Boyz                             3187
JB                                         3252
Yack                                     3411  
B. Malloy                              3480
Brad P.                                 3690
T-Bone                                 4043          
Bird                                      4137


Tournament                         Bonus Winner               Amount
Hyundai                                 B. Malloy                           $11
Sony                                      T. Bone                             $11
Humana                                 Bak9Boyz                         $11
Waste Mgmt.                         Brad P./MVP                    $5/$5
Farmers Insurance                B. Malloy                           $11
AT&T Pebble Beach             Brad P.                              $11
Northern Trust                       Bird                                   $11
Honda Classic                       Bak9Boyz                          $11
WGC Doral                           N.Scalise                           $22
Valspar                                  B. Malloy                           $11
Bay Hill                                 JB                                       $11
Valero Texas                        G. Moore                            $11
Shell Houston                       N. Scalise                           $11
Masters                                 T-Bone                               $33
RBC                                      T-Bone                              $11
Zurich                                   Judge P                              $11
WGC Matchplay                   MVP                                   $22
The Players                          K. Mac                                $11
Wells Fargo                          Bak9Boyz                           $11
Crown Invitational                 Brad P.                               $11
Byron Nelson                        Judge P.                             $11
The Memorial                        MVP                                   $11
St. Jude                                Judge P.                             $11
US Open                              N. Scalise                           $33
Travelers                              N. Scalise                           $11
Greenbrier                            MVP                                   $11
John Deere                           Brad P.                               $11
British Open                         Judge P.                              $33
RBC Canadian                    Judge P.                              $11
Quicken Loans                     Yack                                    $11
Bridgestone                          Bird                                     $22
PGA Championship             G. Moore                            $33
Wyndham Champ.               K. Mac                                $11


                        GOLFERS USED THRU BARCLAYS
                       (golfers listed alphabetically)

JB: Bae, BradleyBowditchCabreraCasey, Chappell, Day, deJonge, Donald, Donaldson , Dubbison, English, Finau, Fleetwood, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia, Gomez, Grace, Haas, Henley, C. Hoffman,  M. Hoffman,  Holmes, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, M. Jones, Kaymer, Kirk, Knox, Koepka, Kokrak, Kuchar, Laird, Lee, Leishman, Lingmerth, Luiten, Mahan, Matsuyama, Mickelson, Molinari, Na, R. Moore, Oostey, Ogilvy, O'Hair, Palmer, Reed, Rose, Scott, Schwartzel, Senden, Snedds, Speith, Steele, Stenson, Streb, Suh, Thomas, Tringale, Vegas, Walker, Watney, Woods

KMac: S.M. Bae, Bowditch, Bradley,  Casey, B. Davis, Day, deJonge, DeLaet, Donald, Donaldson, Els, English, Finau, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia, Harrington, Haas, C. Hoffman, M. Hoffman, Holmes,  Horschel, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, Jones, Kaymer, Kirk, Koepka, Knox, Kuchar, Laird, Langley, Lee, Leishman, Lingmerth, Mahan, Martin, Matsuyama, Mickelson, Molinari, Moore, Na, Ogilvy, Oostey, Palmer, Pettersson, Poulter, Reed, Rose, Schwartzel, Scott, Simpson, Singh, Snedds, Speith, Stallings, Steele, Stefani, J. Thomas, Todd, Vegas, Walker, Willett, Woodland

Bak9Boyz: Bae, Barnes, Bowditch, Bradley, Bubba, Casey, Choi, Day, deJonge, DeLaet, Donald, Donaldson, V. Dubbs, Dufner, Finau, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia, Grace, Haas, Hadley,  Hearn, Henley, Hoffman, Holmes, Horschel, Jacobson, D. Johnson, M. Jones,  Kirk, Koepka, Kuchar, Laird, Lee, Leishman, Lowery, Martin, Matsuyama, McIlroy, Mickelson, R. Moore, Na, Ogilvy, O'Hair, Oostey, Ortiz, Palmer, Rodgers, Rose, Sabbatini, S.Y. Noh,  Schwartzel, Scott, Simpson, Snedds, Steele, Streelman, Stricker, Thomas, Thompson, Vijay, Walker, Warren

Yack:  Bae, Blixt, Bubba, Bowditch, Bradley, Casey, B. Davis, Day, deJonge, DeLaet, Donald, Dufner, Els, English, Every, Fowler, Garcia, Grace, Haas, D. Hearn, C. Hoffman, Holmes, Horschel, Howell, Ishikowi, F. Jacobson, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, Kaymer, Kisner, Koepka, Kokrak, Kuchar, Lee, Leishman, Levin, Lingmerth, Mahan, B. Martin, Matsuyama, McIlroy, Mickelson, Oostey, Ortiz, Palmer, P. Perez,  Putnam, Rose, Sabbatini, Schwartzl, Scott, Speith, Steele, Stenson, Stricker, Stroud, Summerhays, Vegas, Walker, Westwood, Woods

Judge P: Blixt, Bowditch,  Bradley, Bubba, Casey, GF Castano, Day, deJonge, DeLaet, Donald, Finau, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia, Grace, Haas, Henley, C. Hoffman, Horschel, Howell 3, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, Kirk, Kisner, Koepka, Kokrak, Kuchar,  Laird, Lee, Leishman, Lingmerth, Mahan,  Matsuyama, G-McDowell, McIlroy, F. Molinari, R. Moore, Oostey, Ogilvy, Palmer, Pettersson, Poulter, Reed, Romero, Rose, Sabbatini,  Schwartzel, Scott, Senden, Simpson, Snedds, Speith, Steele, Streb, Streelman, Stefani, Stenson, Thomas, Vegas, Villegas, Walker, Westwood, Wilcox, Willet, Woodland

T-Bone: Allenby, Barnes, Bradley, Bubba, P. Casey, Cink, T. Clark, Day, deJonge, Donald, Dufner, Els, English, Furyk, Garcia, Grace, Goosen, Haas, Harrington, JJ Henry, Hoffman, JB Holmes, Immelman, Ishikowa, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, Kaymer, Koepka, Leishman, Matsuyama, McDowell, Merrick, Merritt, Mickelson, F. Molinari, R. Moore, Ogilvy, O'Hair, Oostey, R. Palmer, Perez,  Poulter, Reed, Rose, Sabbatini, Schwartzel, Senden, Simpson, V.Singh, Speith, Stenson, Villegas, Walker, Weekley, Westwood, Woods

Bird: A. Badds, Bae, Beljan, Blixt, Bowditch, K.Bradley, Bubba, Cabrera,  Cejka, Choi, Day, deJonge, Donald, Dubisson, Dufner, English, Every, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia, Haas, Hearn, Henley, Henry, C. Hoffman, Holmes, Horschel, Immelman, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, Kaymer, Knox, Koepka, Kuchar, Laird, Leishman, Lingmerth, Matsuyama, McGirt,  Mickelson, F.Molinari, R. Moore,  O'Hair, C. Ortiz, Oostey, R. Palmer, Pettersson,  Reed, Rose, Scott, Simpson, V. Singh, Snedeker, Speith, Steele, Stenson, Thomas, Vegas, Villegas, Walker, Woods

Brad P: S.M. Bae, Bradley, Bubba, Choi,  Day, deJonge, Donald, English, Finau, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia,  Goosen, Grace, Haas, Harrington, Holmes, C.Howell3, F. Jacobson, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, Karlson, Kaymer, Kisner, Koepka, Kokrak, Kuchar, Laird, Lee, Lingmerth, Mahan, Matsuyama, G. McDowell, McIlroy, Merritt, F. Molinari, Na, Noh, Ogilvy, Oostey, Palmer, J. Peterson, Poulter, Reed, Rose, Sabbatini, Scott, Singh, Snedds, Speith, Stenson, Streb, Streelman, Stricker, Thomas, Walker, Westwood, Weekley, Woodland, Woods

MVP:  Bae, Barnes, Berger, Blixt, Bowditch, Bubba, Casey, Day, deJonge, DeLaet,  Donald, Donaldson, Dufner, Fowler, Grace, F. Jacobson, Haas, Hadley, Hearn, Henley, C. Hoffman, Holmes, Horschel, D. Johnson, Kaymer, Kisner, Knox, Koepka, Kuchar, Laird,  Lee, Lingmerth, Mahan, Matsuyama, Z. Johnson, Mickelson, R. Moore, Na, Ogilvy, O'Hair, Oostey, Owen, R. Palmer, Perez, Poulter, Reed, Rose, Schwartzel, Senden, Sergio, Simpson, Snedds, Speith, Steele, Stefani, Stenson, Stricker, J. Thomas, Walker, Westwood, Willett, Woodland

GMoore: Bradley, Bubba, Casey, Cjeka, T. Clark, Day, deJonge, DeLaet, Donald, Donaldson, English, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia, Goosen, Grace, Haas, Henley, Holmes, Horschel, Huh?, F. Jacobson, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, M. Jones, Kirk, Knox, Koepka, Kokrak,  Kuchar, Laird, Lee, Leishman, Lingmerth, Matsuyama, McIlroy,  Mickelson, R. Moore, Molinari, Na, Ogilvy, O'Hair, Oostey, Palmer, Pettersson, Poulter, Reed, Sabbatini, Schwartzel, Scott, Senden, Simpson, Snedds, Speith, Stefani,  Stenson, Streb, Sullivan,  Thomas, Todd, Wagner, Walker, Weekley, Wilcox

BMalloy: Bae, Bowditch, Bradley, Bubba, Casey, Choi, T. Clark,  Day, DeLaet, Donald, Dubuisson, Every, Finau, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia, Grace, Haas, C. Hoffman, Holmes, Horschel, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson, Kaymer, C. Kirk, Kisner, Knox, Koepka, Kuchar, Laird, Leishman, Lingmerth, Lowery, Mahan, Matsuyama, G. McDowell, McIlroy, Merritt, Molinari, R. Moore, Oostey, O'Hair, Owen, R. Palmer, Poulter, P. Reed, Rose, Sabbatini, Schwartzel, Scott, Simpson, Sneddeker, Speith,  Stenson, Streb, Streelman, J. Thomas, Vegas, Walker, Watney, Westwood, Woodland, Woods

N.Scalise: Baddelay, Bae, Bohn, Bowditch, Bradley, Bubba, Casey, Cjeka, T. Clark, Day, Donald, Finau, Fowler, Furyk, Garcia, Grace, Haas, Harman, Hearn, Henley, M. Hoffman, Holmes, Horschel, F. Jacobson, D. Johnson, Z. Johnson,  M. Jones, Koepka, Kuchar, Laird, Lee, Leishman, Lingmerth, Matsuyama, McIlroy, Mickelson,  Molinari, Oostey, Ogilvy, O'Hair, R. Palmer, Pettersson, Poulter, Reed, Romero, Rose, Sabbatini, Schwartzel, Scott, Senden, Simpson, Speith, Steele, Stefani, Stenson, Streb, Snedds,  J. Thomas, Todd, Villegas, Wagner, Watney, Wilcox, Woodland

Sunday, February 1, 2015

Thoughts on the Super Bowl and Other Stuff

By. Mike Baxter, with some one line contributions from Judge Patrick

Professor Yack's Prognosticating Mood Lately
Another dreadful season of picking winners has thankfully come to an end ( FYI, I started writing this post the first week of January), with yours truly (and The Legend) failing to even hit the 50% mark ATS for the second season in a row. After finishing the 2013 campaign one game under .500 in the Las Vegas Hilton Supercontest-now referred to as the Westgate Las Vegas Resort Super Contest, which for what its worth, doesn't sound as cool- the 2014 campaign was an even bigger abortion.

It got so bad that I opted to punt on the blog not even halfway through the season. I was so frustrated in my ability to be on the right side, that I shamed myself into a corner and took my pen and paper with me. In fact, the last time I wrote a piece on this two bit website was back in November, when I predicted that the Redskins would go on a late season run and make the playoffs.

God, am I dumb.

And the irony about that piece, is that swing and miss of a blog-post, just about sums up my prognosticating skills over the last two NFL seasons.

Until now, where I'm going to attempt to predict the Grand Poobah of the NFL- the league that continues to make hand over fist money, despite one PR nightmare after another, while being led by Roger "I never saw the tape, nothing to see here" Goodell.

"You said, 'balls'. Huh-huh-huh-huh..."
Take for instance Deflategate. (Yeah, I bet you want another opinion on this story like you want genital warts.)  Ok, everyone wants to point the finger at Tom Brady and Bill Belichick, and maybe they did have something to do with the balls- huh-huh...huh-huh- being deflated. But at this point, who gives a shit? The real problem is that that can be done in the first place.

You mean to tell me that with all the billions of dollars the NFL is making off of ass hats like myself, and the millions of dollars that the before mentioned red head commissioner makes, that the NFL can't employ some other ass hat to watch and monitor the balls-huh-huh...huh-huh- for each game??? You know, like pay another official to have all the balls with him from the time he arrives at the stadium until the time he leaves???

And if you need one guy for each team's sideline, then so be it, hire two extra guys to do this job. All this, "the Patriots balls were 11.5 psi and the Colts balls were 12.5 psi" is bullshit! I mean, are you kidding me, Roger?!?!

How does each team have their own game balls in the first place?

Here, NFL, I'm going to solve this in one sentence: Get two extra officials, have them bring 20 or 24 balls to the stadium, divide the balls in half, and be done with it. None of this, "Well, the NFL checks the balls 2.5 hours before kickoff, and then that's it." I mean, come on. Its so fucking dumb, and I've had to listen to this nonsense for two weeks now. Enough already.

A quick review of things and some observations, before I break down the Super Bowl.

*As I mentioned. The Legend and I are now 0-2 in our two attempts at cashing in the Westgate Las Vegas Resort Super Contest. It was a dreadful season, but nobody was catching the guy who posted an astonishing 64-20-1 ATS record, to take home $600,000+. That's an absurd 76.1% ATS, for those of you counting at home. Better luck to us next year, right Legend? Sidenote: WE do have New England to win today, a wager that The Legend put down back in August, $1000 at 7/1. (unfortunately for US, I'm not "feeling it". More on that in a minute....)

*"American Sniper" is an awesome movie, period. Its not propaganda, its not Democrat vs Republican. Its 2.5 hours of a compelling, interesting look at what this guy went through during his 4 war zone tours. My apologies to Seth Rogan and his piece of shit "The Interview" movie that I spent $6 on, and I'm sorry your movie studio Sony is run by a bunch of pussies, which all but torpedoed that piece of shit movie in the first place. Now having said that, you and Michael Moore can go fuck yourselves.

Not to continue Kevin McCarthy on you, but "Boyhood" sucked, and is completely overrated- I thought I was watching a Lifetime movie, and "Whiplash" is unbelievably good. J.K. Simmons' character in "Whiplash" makes the Gunnery Sergeant in "Full Metal Jacket" look like a choir boy.

*I see Bruce Jenner will be featured in a documentary that will cover his "life transformation". That should be neat. Also neat, is probably the state of mind of those two girls he had with Kris Jenner. Lets see, their big (assed) sister Kim got famous for crushing an anaconda in a video that went viral, their mom has essentially been whoring out the entire family since they were in grade school, and now their dad is going to chronicle his transformation from a man into a woman, on national television. Speaking of prognosticating, I predict lots of coke, STD tests, and therapy for those two Jenner girls.

In fact, see if your man will take a 3 team parlay on Kylie Jenner: coke arrest, gang bang video gone viral, and unmarried and pregnant by a rapper, all by the age of 22. Take that money to the bank!

*Jayson Werth checked into a Fairfax County jail this weekend to begin his 5 day sentence for driving like a horse's ass on the Capital Beltway last summer. Werth was clocked doing 105 mph by a Virginia State Trooper, which was ironic, since "105" is about what he hit in last October's NLDS loss against the Giants. You remember that series, where basically Bryce Harper and Anthony Rendon showed up, and guys like the "Werewolf of London" himself looked like a little leaguer during those four games, and then he couldn't even talk to reporters following the dismal performance.

Compound that with the mind boggling decision to wait until early January to have shoulder surgery (Werth claims that he started feeling pain in an off season workout, but the facts are that he was having problems with that shoulder in August, and in fact missed a week of play because of it) that takes 3 months to rehab from, and this Nats fan has a real case of the ass.

John Feinstein says that Werth is one of the least likable athletes in the history of D.C. sports, and there are not too many times when I agree with things that come out of Feinstein's mouth. But I'm with the name dropper on this one.

"Do I make you horny?"
*Finally, if you want to read a story about a 69 year old senior news reporter for 60 Minutes texting his 41 year old mistress that he's "too old and sick to jerk off" and other neat love messages, read the New York Post story from yesterday. Also, you got to love the main stream media trotting out a guy who shares cigarettes with the President- a man he refers to as "Barry"- to deliver those hard hitting interviews.

Seattle (Pick'em) vs New England
I'm not going to take up too much more of your time, or space in this precious cyberspace. I'm not really into snark and awe, so I'll cut to the chase. Defense and run game win football games. Its been that way forever in the National Football League. And for the 2014 campaign, the Seattle Seahawks were numero uno in both of those categories- as in, of the 32 NFL teams in the entire league, the Seahawks were first in total defense, and first in total rushing offense.

I don't expect a total blowout like last year's debacle, as I'll give Tom Brady a slight advantage over Peyton Manning, and John Fox isn't even in the conversation with Bill Belichick. So don't expect a 43-8 beat down like last year's big game. But Seattle's defense is like gang busters, chatty Marshawn Lynch can run wild, and let me go on record and tell you that Russell Wilson could not possibly play any worse than he did two weeks ago against Green Bay in the NFC Championship Game. And Seattle still won.

New England is not great away from Foxboro. They were a very ho hum (considering they're AFC Champions) 4-4 ATS on the road, including two absolute ass kickings they took at the hands of Kansas City (Top 10 run team) and Miami (12th in league, total rushing). I think Seattle's defense gets to a not very mobile Tom Brady, I think the Pats will put those deflated balls on the ground a couple times, and I think its back to back Lombardi Trophies for the Pacific Northwest.

Legend, I apologize to US both in advance. Seahawks, 26-16.

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Two Road Wins in San Fran and Indy, and Its On To The Playoffs!

By. Mike Baxter

Sports are supposed to be fun. Quite frankly, I'm sick and tired of sports taking its proverbial cock and shoving it up my ass. Hence the reason I've opted not to post my ATS picks since Week 5. (22-28 ATS thru 10 weeks in the LVHSC)

It got so bad that I even had The Legend pick two weeks, so yeah, I'm a quitter too. Kind of like the 1,3, and 4 hitters on the Nats during the first week of October. (That's a whole another "sports" story in my life, that required 4 therapy sessions and a Tuesday night bender with two prostitutes and a three fingered midget)

But in any case, sports is supposed to be fun and entertaining- something that takes us away from the normal day to day activities of tweeting, poker, and tweeting. And although most of the DMV has punted on our Washington Redskins 2014 season, I've found a glimmer of hope, like a flop that completely missed me, but one that I'm going to float, because I'm taking this bitch down on the river.

Coach Jay Gruden recently said that this team was a few plays away, or some shit like that, from being 7-2. And although I think this is a bit of a stretch, I would say that 5-4 is more like it, and you don't have to look any further than their last game.

The Redskins should've beat Minnesota, period, end of story. For one, RG3 played a lot better than myself or most of the DMV probably expected him to play after his injury layoff. He made some very good throws and made at least one unbelievable play with his feet. The Redskins dominated the first half, and be it not for that late first half, awful fucking pass he threw, the Redskins would've won that game EASILY. The difference between going into halftime up 10-0 versus 10-7, especially in the manner in which 10 to 7 got there, was like night and day. Which is why I questioned all the MMQBs who killed Jim Haslett for that one, but whatever...

The second game I'd make a case for is Week 3 at Philly. Kirk Cousins throws for 427 yards (which, oh by the way, everyone punting on him already...hold off...) and your offense scores 34 points, you have to win the fucking game!!!! And you CANNOT give up 100 yard kick off returns for touchdowns! So yeah, I'm making a strong case that they could've won that game.

So I'd say they're a 5-4 "type" team, who could've beat the current division leader on the road, and who DID go into the division leader's (at the time) house on Monday Night Football, and punched them right in their stupid, botoxed faces.

So the Redskins have proven that they can play with 7-2 and 7-3 type teams, and they did this without their starting Quarterback. And now they have their starting Quarterback back, for the late season, playoff run.

First things first, the Redskins will pummel the Fuccaneers this weekend at Fed Ex. The Fucs have scored 17 points or less for 4 straight weeks. They've had a merry go round at the Quarterback position, and not because of injury. Their defense is 31st against the pass, and if you were somewhat impressed with RG3's first week back from injury, he should get his grove back in a big way this Sunday. I didn't play the Redskins in the Hilton contest (listen, I'm not that fucking crazy...), but I most likely will lay the 7 and pound them with my man come 12:45 Sunday afternoon.

So we've established that the Redskins will be 4-6 going into the two crucial games of this late season run. And here we go:

They can beat Frisco in Frisco, and I'm actually confident that they will. The 49ers are not who we thought they were, Mr. Green. There is coaching change chatter, they've had off the field issues, and they're not the juggernaut of a team that they were a couple years ago. Statistically, they're ranked 20th on offense and 2nd on defense, but defensively, they're still yielding almost 23 points/per. If the Redskins protect the football AND their special teams does not shit the bed, they will win this game going away. Mark my word.

Next week's game is not going to be as "easy". The only thing I'll say is that the Redskins will be riding a two game winning streak, including an impressive roadie at Frisco. So their confidence- especially Griffin's, will be high.  And I think playing indoors and on the turf might be to the Redskins advantage. Listen, I'm not Rich fucking Turpin, as I don't sleep in my burgundy and gold colored glasses, but Griffin to D-Jax a few times, could equate to as gratifying a win as Monday night in Dallas was a few weeks ago.

As far as how they'll contain that Luck guy, uhh, blah-blah-blah-blah...bluh-bluh-bluh-bluh. Or in other words, lets hope Jim Haslett draws up a game plan similar to that Monday night game.

So now the Redskins are 6-6 with 4 games to play. Those 4 games include 3 home games against St. Louis, Dallas, and Philly- obviously, under the scenario I've presented in this post, all games they must win. Their lone roadie during this stretch is at the Giants, which is no walk in the park, but one in which they can and must win to complete the late season run, finishing with a 10-6 record.

As far as getting into the playoffs is concerned, they will do so by virtue of winning the division. They will have beaten Dallas twice, who ultimately will be 8-8 (see their schedule after this week's bye). And looking at Philly's schedule, they could easily lose 4-5 of their remaining 7 games, to finish 10-6 or 9-7.

For one, they have Mark Sanchez under center for the rest of the way. I realize he's got playoff pedigree, but he's still Mark Sanchez. And their schedule includes this week's tilt at Green Bay (which they'll lose), two games against Dallas (they'll split), and games against Seattle in Philly (Redskins fans will be HUGE Seahawks fans this day), at Washington (loss), and at NY Giants.

So there it is. Two huge roadies that can make or break the season. And if by some chance they were to win them both, they WILL win the division and get a home playoff game against either Seattle, Green Bay, or Detroit. Keep the faith, Redskins fan. Runner-runner flush is doable.

Friday, October 3, 2014

NFL Week 5: Vegas Week

Because I'm tired of taking it on the chin as a prognosticator, and because I'm busy doing other shit in preparation for my 5 days in Sin City starting this weekend, I'm not going to give much "insight" into this week's picks. In fact, I've officially gone to the bullpen and have had my partner in crime, and the ass hat I'll be hanging with this weekend- The Legend- pick two of the five games for me. In any case, the Yack (dick-ish third person "speak") is on a cooler, and needs back up quickly. "Legend.....?!?!?"

Chicago (+2.5) at Carolina
Jay Cutler or L.A. Realtor?
The Panthers are starting an un-drafted rookie at running back this week. My brain has started a bunch of un-drafted brain cells through the first 4 weeks of this season, as I've struggled to an 8-12 ATS record. Jay Cutler is tied for second in the entire league with 10 TDs thrown. He also looks exactly like one of those gay real estate agents on "Million Dollar Listing L.A". And when I say gay, word police, I say it because the guy is really gay, as in he's a homosexual.

Da Bears are 0-2 at home and 2-0 on the road. Carolina's once bend but don't break defense is currently 24th in total yards allowed and 17th in points allowed. Not to mention their offense is bottom 7 in both yards and points per game. Jay Cutler stakes his claim, and puts his sign in the yard on the road again. SOLD BY JAY! 19-14 Bears.        

Pittsburgh at Jacksonville (+6)
Danny Smith's punter "booted" a 29 yard punt last week to put the previously win less Buccaneers in primo starting position, just prior to their go ahead touchdown. Following the Special Teams blunder and subsequent chok-errrrrr, losing of the game, Smith told reporters, "For a moment there, I thought I was back in Washington." And for Redskin fan, whose team has had an interesting 4 weeks doing that Special Teams thing, it was "right back at ya, Danny!"

Pittsburgh's Steel Curtain is now 21st in the league in points allowed through 4 weeks. And as a whole, the Steelers are being outscored 73-41 in the second half of games played this year. I don't think the Steelers are very good, and at some point Blake Bortles and the Jacks are going to keep a game close. The Steelers are 3-8-1 ATS in their last 12 as a road favorite. Martigale the dog piss out of the Jacks until they cover, and let's hope "until" comes this Sunday. 23-20 Steelers.

Baltimore at Indy (-3.5)
Although the Ravens have had an interesting first few weeks of the season with all the Ray Rice news, the only drama surrounding Andrew Luck is how long he'll let his neck hair grow, and if he'll spout off that trademark goofy laugh of his at post game pressers.

The Colts are 4-0 ATS at home in their last 4 home contests vs a team with a winning record. Baltimore is not that good, IMO. They lost at home to the only good team they've played thus far (Cincy), and getting the Colts in this spot is not exactly awful Pittsburgh on a short week with travel (Week 2) or last week at home vs a beat up Carolina team. HUH-HUH-HUH-Giggle-Giggle-HUH-HUH-HUH-Giggle-Giggle. Colts 31-23.

Tampa at New Orleans (-10)
I must've missed the memo regarding the New Orleans Saints and Drew Brees sucking, because I'm not really sure what I was watching last Sunday night in Dallas. 1-3 through 4 weeks, and Saints fans are Jonesing for the days of bounties and Sean Payton rummaging through the team doctor's office for pills.

The Saints have won 5 straight tilts between these two, which includes the last 3 played in N'Orleans. Those 3 games included 2 games which saw the Saints post at least a 40 piece on the scoreboard, with the average margin of victory being 25 points. I'll give you Mike Glennon, and I'll take Drew Brees. Fair? Don't break out those paper bags quite yet, Saint fan.  36-21 Saints.

Buffalo at Detroit (-7)
Kyle Orton was named the starter this week in Buffalo. Bad news for him and his teammates is that they have a date with the NFL's #1 ranked defense. Yep, Lion fan, you're allowing the fewest yards per game (267.3 yards/per), and the 4th lowest points per (15.5). Ndamukong Suh has been so impressed with how the Lions entire unit has come together, that he hasn't had to step on anyone's head yet, after the whistle blows.

The Bills are 0-6 ATS in their last 6 roadies vs a team with a winning record. Megatron should be a go following some ankle issues, and he is primed to go 9-172-2. The NFC North might be the most interesting and competitive division in football this year, and like my boy D. Green, I like the Lions. 31-17 Detroit.

LAST WEEK                                                        1-4 ATS
YTD                                                                   8-12 ATS (40%)
Reg. Season Since '09                          196-160-12 ATS (55%)

Follow along as we pursue excellence in the Las Vegas Hilton Super Contest. @Sportsyack on Twitter.