Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Redskins Report, Bevis and Butthead (and Dumbass)


Too Painful To Watch

If there is one thing that we took from Sunday night's 17-0 (should've been 42-0) defeat at the hands of the hated Cowboys, it's that the Redskins need to trade Chris Cooley. Just kidding.

But seriously, they really do need to get rid of most of the players that are currently on this team.

Three conclusions can be drawn after watching this current Redskins team for the last few years; they are not very good, the roster is mostly made up of bad guys and losers, and like Riggo said, Dan Snyder does have a dark heart.

The only guy that we can say with any confidence has been playing hard throughout and truly cares about winning is London Fletcher. Everyone else is either not that good or is driven by their own personal agendas. As long as you have guys on a team who will split up and go their own individuals ways when things get tough, you will always be playing meaningless games in December.

When you are counting on the likes of Albert Haynesworth ($41 million for every other down, and doesn't listen to coaches), Laron Landry(doesn't wrap and dances after tackling an opponent who just picked up 8 yards), and Deangelo Hall (he's Deangelo Hall) to help right the ship, you're already sailing on the Titanic.

These guys are losers, plain and simple. They don't get what it takes to be winners. They don't understand that it's not always about them. They don't understand the attention you garner for winning is greater than any individual praise or awards you could receive. It's always about what the team can do for them as opposed to what they can do for the team.

Clinton Portis, Santana Moss, Mike Sellers, Antwan Randle El- paid like winners, produce like losers.

Randle El has been about the worst punt returner in the NFL for the last couple years, but has refused to give it up until just recently. That's just selfish. And eff Danny Smith for not pulling him sooner.

Cooley has put up good numbers throughout his career, but is known more so nationally for blogging, banging cheerleaders, and posting a picture of his penis on the internet. That's just stupid. Cooley is an attention whore and when you are 6-17 in your last 23 games, the last thing you should be drawing to yourself is attention, blondie.

Last year, Santana Moss took a 15 yard unsportsmen like conduct penalty for emulating shining his shoes after he scored a touchdown in a road loss, versus a bad (at the time) Cincinnati Bengal team.

Recently against the Giants on Monday night, he caught a pass down the sideline to set up a possible pre-halftime score. Down 24-0 and with precious seconds ticking away, Moss gets up from being tackled, and instead of flipping the ball to the ref, he spun it like a top- causing more time to be wasted, for a team that needs all the time(and help) it can get.


Enough is enough people. If you still haven't gotten it through your head by now that this team needs to be completely reconstructed, then you are the fan that Dan Snyder preys on.

The segment of fan out there that still believes- regardless of actual facts and stats, that the Redskins are just a player away, really needs to have their head examined. They are YEARS away, especially on the offensive side of the ball.

The bottom line is that they are embarrassing to watch and support, and the sooner that pieces are disassembled, so that new pieces can be put in, the better things will be, and maybe the future will start to look brighter.

George Allen's son has his work cut out for him. We wish him all the best.


Maybe Bevis and Butthead Were On To Something

Jokes on us. Mike Wilbon and Tony Kornholio weren't just talking shit last week when they declared that both the Saints and Vikings were finished, they were predicting the future. Maybe that's why those two donkeys are on ESPn.

Following a home loss to the hapless Bucs, the now 13-2 Saints all of the sudden resemble the Saints of yesteryear. Someone get me my paper bag!

Don't fret, Saint fan. The Saints are still a wrecking ball offensively and they get the first week bye, and home field advantage throughout. We still like them to represent the NFC in the Superbowl. That's of course unless they lose to Dallas or Philly. Or Green Bay.

The Vikings on the other hand, have now lost 3 out of their last 4, and they have a dumb ass for a head coach.

Brett Favre may be an egotistical horse's ass, but he is the reason the Vikings are 11-4, not Brad CHILDress. When dumb ass CHILDress tried to take the horse's ass out of the game versus Carolina, he opened up a door and showed the world the internal power struggle that is the Minnesota Vikings.

In Politics, its the economy, and with the Vikings, its Brett Favre. Tony Kornholio could coach that team with Brett Favre at the helm, and if dumb ass Tony Kornholio look alike CHILDress, who just got a contract extension from some dude named Zygi Wilf, doesn't start doing what the horse's ass tells him, Zygi Wilf's team can forget about any post season success.


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