Thursday, August 5, 2010

Drugs, Cheating, Laziness: The Recipe for $ucce$$




What in god's name was Nancy Reagan thinking with that stupid "Just Say No" campaign? And to all the "squares" out there preaching about the moral pitfalls of cheating- spare me. Finally, what's this horseshit about 'hard work' paying off? Hahahahaha....

The bank accounts of today's athletes who have allowed the "straight and narrow" pieces of advice to fall on deaf ears, prove that they know best.

A-Rod, who hit his 600th home run yesterday, has $252 million in the bank and has played ring toss with roast beef sandwiches like Kate Hudson, Madonna, and Elliot Spitzer's sloppy seconds- all in the name of his acknowledged PED use.

Here in D.C., Mike Shanahan's whipping boy- Albert Haynesworth, proves that off season work outs that include banging strippers and evading debt collectors, is all one needs to cha-ching $41 million in guaranteed money.



The :45 mark- "I even developed a couple abs." The 1:00 mark- "I'm not a guy that just loves to go workout."



The point is, all these dumb ass parents out there, who are enrolling their kids in baseball and football training camps, need to get with the program! Its hookers and blow, and that's all you need to know!

Seriously though, guys like A-Rod could give a shit if he's not in the HOF in 15 years, or if Mike Lupica and Bob Costas think he's an asterisk to the game. The guy has millions of dollars in the bank, certainly enough to pay off the ex-wife and kids ten times over (see Tiger Woods), and can still come and go as he pleases, as jock sniffers and skirts watch his every move.

And Fat Albert? You think that dude cares about his obligations to the Redskins organization? Do you think he gives a shit about the fans, his teammates, or September 12, 2010? He doesn't, purists. He's got $41 million in the bank.

One has to wonder what does go on in the minds of kids today. Over the past ten years or so, parents have probably had a hard time trying to explain the economics of sports, as they pertain to athletes not always doing the right thing, but then still being rewarded with the jack.

Whether its that happy Clemens' couple shooting each other up in their bedroom, or having to explain who that 'little boy' was in Barry Bonds' uniform circa 1987, or keeping track of the names of the women falling out of Tiger's Wood-work, the stories that accompany some athletes' march up the corporate ladder, are PG-13 at best.

So in a reflection of whats right and wrong with sports- in light of A-Rod's 600th yesterday and the on going Albert Haynesworth saga out at Redskin Park, I'm left with one lasting question, about a guy who seemed like such a dick just a month and a half ago.

Can LeBron James really be that bad of a guy? Probably not.




Please follow Sportsyackontap on twitter @sportsyack and @JudgePatrick

Images used courtesy of flickr.com and YouTube

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