Saturday, November 27, 2010

"I never root for Dallas." - Simpleton Redskin fan on Twitter

Rich Campbell, who is the Redskin beat reporter for The Free Lance-Star(Fredricksburg), and a damn good one, we might add, received a tweet at the conclusion of the Saints/Cowboys game by an alleged Redskin fan. The "fan", who will remain nameless, said to Campbell, "I never root for the Cowboys, playoffs or not."

So Campbell opted to retweet (post) this comment to his page, and asked his followers, "Anyone agree/disagree?"- an obvious attempt by Campbell, to get a response from other tweeps (like ourselves), to possibly engage this window licker in conversation about what the NFC playoff picture looks like. So that's what we did.

We initially told this fella that if he indeed was a Redskin fan, his comment was 'dumb', as the Saints were one of four teams between the Redskins and the Wild Card spots.

This fan responded again that he never roots for the Cowboys, and "it will be losses to the Rams and Lions that keep us out, not a Saints loss."

By this point, multiple twitterers were engaging this dipshit about his stupidity, trying to explain to him that the 3-8 Cowboys are non-factors, and if a Cowboy win helps the Redskins get a playoff berth- as one guy told him, "then I'll slap a star on!"

This was the point in the "conversation" when I knew we were dealing with a total moron. King Simpleton went on to say, "We've had this discussion before. I'll never root for the Boys, ever!" He added, "plus they (Saints) have 5 more games, plenty of time for them to lose!"

Hey ass clown, let me break it down for you. With only 6 games to play, there are now 4 teams between the Redskins and the final playoff spots. These 4 teams have anywhere from a 1 game to 2.5 game lead on them. What that means in layman terms- or should we say, "dumbass terms", when trying to explain this to an idiot like yourself, is that all of the 4 teams ahead of the Redskins, need to start losing. Immediately.

And as you claim to be a fan, as you patronize with your comments of me being a "realist" and that "you're kidding yourself if you think the Redskins are a playoff team", I at least can recognize that when one team who is challenging the Redskins for a playoff berth (Saints), is playing another team who is not(Cowboys), that as a Redskins fan, although it's not my favorite thing to do, I probably need and want the Cowboys to prevail.

In closing, Redskin fan, I'd like to give you one free lesson on who you should be rooting for over the final 6 weeks of the season. I'm going to try and do so in the same manner in which a grade school teacher would teach her 7 year old student basic math. We'll use this weekend's games as the example. Feel free to use your fingers when keeping track of teams' wins and losses:

Green Bay at Atlanta
Probably a good outcome either way for Redskin fan, but most likely Redskin fan should be rooting for Atlanta. The Redskins have already beaten Green Bay, and getting the Packers closer to the Redskins' record, brings in the tie breaker if in fact they finished with the same record.

Jax at NY Giants
This one should be easy. In fact, you won't even need to use your fingers to count. The Giants are in the Redskins division, they already have a one game lead on us as it is, and besides- and this is the easy part, the Jaguars aren't even in our Conference! Root for the Jags, donk.

Kansas City at Seattle
By some chance the Seahawks are passed by St. Louis for the division lead, and the Seahawks were to then factor into the Wild Card equation, root for the Chiefs. And as with the last game, KC isn't even in our Conference.

Philadelphia at Chicago
This game might be a toughy for you. I know you're into the "I would never root for..." business, but I'm afraid you might have to go to the well once again this weekend, and root for another NFC East team, the Eagles. Why? Well, the Eagles already have a 2 game lead on the Redskins, and are leading the division. And as with the Packers, the Redskins own the tie breaker if the two teams (Redskins and Bears) finished with identical records.

Tampa Bay at Baltimore

Another easy one, and probably the last game on the card that you probably need to have any interest in. Root for the Ravens, partner. They're not even in our Conference, the Bucs are, and the Bucs have a 2 game lead on the Redskins.

Follow on twitter@sportsyack

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