Friday, July 22, 2011

Lavar's Stupid Comments Shine Light on Shanahan's Genius

Fresh off a new contract deal with CBS Radio's 1067 The Fan, wordsmith extraordinaire, Lavar Arrington was at it again on Thursday. Beginning his point with, "the funny thing is, I know we're up on a break, the interesting thing is...", Lavar tried to say that Dan Reeves, not Mike Shanahan, built the 1997 and 1998 Denver Broncos Super Bowl winning teams.

Hell bent, like most of The Fan, to pile on Shanahan and lay the blame at the feet of the coaches and not the players (i.e. a dramatically under performing Donovan McNabb, and a carefree, selfish, millionaire asshole, in Albert Haynesworth), Arrington told his audience about how he was listening to the Mike Wise Show, and a caller from Denver called in, sticking up for Mike Shanahan, reminding the listeners that Shanahan did win two Super Bowls in Denver.

Arrington then said, "Dan Reeves built those teams!...Dan Reeves...built those teams! Mike Shanahan came in, brought in Terrell Davis, and maybe two other guys, and they won a Super Bowl."

Really, Lavar? Your stupidity never ceases to amaze us.

First of all, Shanahan won two Super Bowls, not "a Super Bowl", as you're so inclined to mismanage facts and words, the way you claim Mike Shanahan mismanages his teams. Secondly, Mike Shanahan brought in more than 3 total players in building those back-to-back Super Bowl winning teams. More on that in a minute. And lastly, Dan Reeves was 5 years AND two coaches removed from the first of Shanahan's two Super Bowl wins.

Yeah, real shocker. Lavar failed to mention that in between Dan Reeves and Mike Shanahan, there was two years of Wade Phillips at the helm in Denver. A fact apparently missed by 56.

As far as Lavar's claim that Shanahan "brought in Terrell Davis, and maybe two other guys", that might be one of the dumbest statements ever said on a sports talk radio show. But then again, we are talking about Lavar Arrington, ex-Giant.

Dan Reeves final year in Denver was 1992, five years from when "his team" supposedly won the Super Bowl. Reeves starting roster in 1992 was as follows:

QB- John Elway
RB- Gaston Green, Reggie Rivers, and Greg Lewis, all shared carries.
WR- Mark Jackson and Vance Johnson
TE- Shannon Sharpe

O-Line- Russ Freeman, Jeff Davidson, Keith Kartz, Doug Widell, and Ken Lanier

D-Line- Brian Sochia, Greg Kragen, and Kenny Walker
Linebackers- Mike Croel, Karl Mecklenburg, and Simon Fletcher
Secondary- Steve Atwater, Dennis Smith, Charles Dimry, and Wymon Henderson

Kicker-David Treadwell
Punter- The Broncos used 3 different punters that season.

Now lets take a look at Mike Shanahan's 1997 Bronco roster, the one that he allegedly only brought "Terrell Davis and two other guys" over to. The rest of course, being Dan Reeves and- we guess, but who the fuck knows, because its "Lavar Logic"- Wade Phillips' teams.

QB-John Elway
RB- Terrell Davis, who shouldered the majority of the carries, was a Shanahan draft pick in the 6th round, no less, and went on to rush for 1,750 yards in Shanahan's first Super Bowl season.
WR-Ed McCaffrey and Rod Smith
TE-Shannon Sharpe

O-Line- Gary Zimmerman, Tony Jones, Mark Schlereth, Tom Nalen, and Brian Habib

D-Line- Neil Smith, Keith Traylor, Michael Dean Perry, and Alfred Williams
Linebackers- Bill Romanowski, Allen Aldridge, and John Mobley
Secondary-Ray Crockett, Darrien Gordon, Tyronne Braxton, and Steve Atwater

Kicker- Jason Elam
Punter- Tom Rouen

Wow. By our count, thats only 3 players from Reeves' 1992 team (Elway, Sharpe, and Atwater) who were still starters on Shanahan's 1997 Super Bowl winning team. Maybe what Lavar meant to say was that Shanahan had JUST 3 guys from the Reeves era.

The irony from this idiocy, is that while trying to say how unimportant Mike Shanahan's role was in bringing back-to-back Super Bowl titles to Denver, Lavar actually allowed us to point out how freaking brilliant Mike Shanahan really is. Thanks Lavar, and congratulations on your new radio contract. Go Redskins!
Lavar's comments can be heard at the 13:18 mark of Segment 1, July 21, 2011.

Follow us on twitter @sportsyack, @JudgePatrick, and @beav4666

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Soccer Still Sucks

What a crock of shit. Nothing like using a schoolyard game of dodge ball to end a tournament that takes 3 weeks to complete. I'm not sure how soccer purists can continue to push their agenda on non-soccer purists like myself, when your world stage moment is decided by something a couple of 8 year olds do on the playground each day.

And don't tell me, "Well, hockey does it too!" No they don't, you assholes.

Hockey does do it, but only in the regular season, which as us Caps fans can attest to, is about as meaningful as an engagement to Kim Kardashian.

And they only do it after a 5 minute period has been played, in which they try to decide the outcome by playing the sport I paid to watch. They don't do it in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. And neither does any other professional sport that has any relevance- football, baseball, basketball, golf- none of them.

Hell, even in tennis they don't resort to some Mickey Mouse way of deciding outcomes. Last year at Wimbledon, two guys who nobody knows a god damn thing about, played an 11 hour match in a sport that nobody gives a shit about, to settle a match the way it was meant to be settled- by playing the game the way it was meant to be played, until there was a winner.

So fuck off, soccer. You and your manipulation of patriotism sucked me in for a week, just so I could watch the Americans piss away late leads (twice), and then lose in a game of kick the can.

Congratulations (I guess) to Japan. Our American hearts our broken. I realize this wasn't the worst thing you cocksuckers ever did to us in a single day, but good on you, nonetheless. Its nice to see you finally benefit from a meltdown. That, of course, being the US Women's fruitless penalty kick attempts, in what has to be the dumbest way ever to decide the outcome of a major world sports tournament.

In much happier news, this band is getting back together, so that they can rock out songs like this one.

Follow us on twitter @sportsyack, @JudgePatrick, and @beav4666

Rich Turpin's Very Super Forecast: The 2017 Washington Redskins

By. Rich Turpin Week 1, Philadelphia "Let me fleece Mr. Snyder first, and then I'll see you in 2018!" The Redskins op...