Sunday, November 27, 2011

NFL Week 12: Post-Thanksgiving Stuffing


I hope you enjoyed your Thanksgiving. Mine consisted of laying around at my parents on their recliner, drinking beer, watching football, eating, drinking beer, napping, farting and being proud of it, and watching my man beg for mercy as I hit for the cycle against his punk ass.

Yeah, it sucks to be you if you don't follow @sportsyack on twitter. Otherwise, you missed out on a 3-0 Turkey Thursday by yours truly. Documented, not counting the Thanksgiving Day massacre we delivered to our man, we're now 10 games over .500 for the season. This is shaping up to be an even better NFL season for The Yack than last year's brilliance. Being 10 games over .500 with 6 weeks to go, puts us on about a 17 games over pace, which would pummel last year's season tally of 35-25-3. As always, you're welcome, you degenerates.

Houston(-6) at Jacksonville
I don't care who is quarterbacking the Texans, this game is an easy cover, and this line an absolute joke. For starters, the Jaguars can't score. They've managed to score more than 17 points just twice. In fact, in their last 5 games they've scored 13,12,14,17, and 10. And that 17 pointer was against the god awful Colts, and 14 of those 17 were scored in latter part of the 4th Quarter. (We know, because we had the Jags that day, and we were sweating bullets)

This just in, unsuspecting fan of the NFL who had no idea that the Texans have the #1 ranked defense in the league, the Houston Texans have the #1 ranked defense in the league! Couple that with the return of Andre Johnson, and the hotter than a firecracker running of Arian Foster, and like we said, it doesn't matter who the Texans put behind center. Texans 24-10.


Cleveland at Cincy(-7)
Speaking of teams who can't score, in the Browns last 5 outings, they're averaging just over 10 points per game on offense. And we don't like the Browns in this spot here AT ALL, facing a Bengals team who can score, can defend, and whose coming off two consecutive tough losses to divisional opponents.

The Browns are no slouches on defense, in fact they're 4th in the league, slightly better than the 5th ranked Bengals. However, the Bengals have scored 23 or more points in 6 of their last 7 games, and we're big fans of that ginger/Judge Patrick look alike, Andy Dalton.

Dalton is making a very under the radar play for rookie of the year, NFL writer who already had Cam Newton notched in by week 4. And although Newton is pummeling Dalton in the yards thrown for category, Dalton's TD-INT ratio is considerably better than Newton's, 15-12 vs 12-14. I'm sure as soon as the main stream media realizes this little bit of information, they'll go after Dalton's religious views. Bengals big.


New England/Philadelphia (Over 51)
These two teams like to sit back in shotgun and throw the ball. And although New England has kept it close to the vest defensively the past couple weeks, they're still giving up 404 yards per game, which equates to DFL in the entire NFL.

Both of these teams have played 4 out of their last 5 games UNDER. And Philly's defense- for all the shit they've taken by making their former water boy or coffee runner or whomever they made their defensive coordinator this year, has shaped up to be not too shabby, 12th overall. However, here is how this game shapes up today:

New England will throw the ball a lot, and Philly's defense will not be able to keep them in check. But on the otherside of the ball, Philly will exploit New England extremely porous defense, and this game is going to turn into a track meet. Don't be surprised to see a final score that resembles Andy Reid's waist line, and that fat fuck isn't wearing anything in the 30s. Over


Last Week 2-1 ATS
YTD 22-12-3 ATS

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